Dusk: Shade

2013 has been great I won’t lie. 

Started in January when one fantastic woman looked at me and said, “Shade, hope you don’t mind my saying this, can I pay Erica’s first term fees?”

Ehn? Mind ke.

My name by the way is….you already know my name, Erica is my daughter, I’m a single mum, and a hot photographer.

How I met this woman OGT and how she blessed me a lot financially and otherwise is something I will forever be grateful for. She helped give me a push in my finances early in the year and I was able to get my camera and some lenses. I pray for her everytime.

In my church…well one of my churches -___- at the end of year service, we are made to write down our goals for the new year. Looking though that list, I would say I accomplished over 50% AND THAT IS HUGE.
Basically I’ve learned a lot this year. I remember telling God that I would want to be the Shade from secondary school. The sweet, always smiling, never gets angry Shade. I think it’s working. 🙂

My year has been full of smiles, joy some tears, a little patience, a few angry moments, lots of fish, fruits, ugwu and chicken.
I’ve made decisions I won’t say I regret, but would say I learned from….or not.
My birthday this year has been the best in my 30 something years on earth. I got gifts! Lots of gifts. I love gifts abeg don’t give me that look. I got stuff I didn’t even dream of getting this year at all.
One of the best gifts for me this year was my daughter’s academics. I made a good decision to change her school and I’m so glad I did. The joy I felt in my heart when she asked me after telling me some of her scores ‘Mummy, are you impressed?’
Wow. I was just short of words. It was one of those moments I knew I was doing something right.

By God’s Grace, I did not struggle with finances this year, not for one moment!

Towards the end of this year, I learned patience. A little bit. I learned to accept some behaviour that will otherwise have made me blown a fuse or two. Like right now, typing this, a woman was just rude to me at the bank, na look I dey look am, I no talk. 😐
I smile more now, I took myself out a lot this year because I deserve(d) it. I also developed my shoe and cloth fetish. Dear Lord please don’t let me go bankrupt.

Above all, I have learned to let things go, I still hurt and cry over little things, but I have learned not to hold on to things unnecessarily to things…and people no matter how painful. To let go and let God.

The one thing that has kept me excited a lot this year is fitness. I finally attained my dream dress size, clocked one year in fitness, challenged myself to insanity by Shaun T and was super glad when people kept referring other people to me for weight loss and fitness and some of them telling me how my journey inspired theirs.

I go soon open shop! 

Oh by the way, I caught a bouquet at a wedding, so get ready ladies and gentlemen….

I go soon marry! 

But the ‘koko’ of the matter is, I still don’t have friends and I’m still single…..and hot…and single.


My relationship with God has been errr…ok. It could be much better. I promised my self that it would be fantastic. Sigh.
But at least I’m glad I started morning prayers with my daughter. I laugh when she prays, she uses the same words EVERY morning, that child. I can recite her prayers like the Lord’s.

In all I know that I am very ready for 2014, lots of expectations and high hopes. Training I did this year will be business(es) I’m opening next year.

I know I’m ready for God and He’s ready for me. Whatever you do, write down this name ISHOLA FOLASHADE JANET and also remember the name SAZZYE. I know these two names will be mentioned a lot next year so help me God!


Amen sister. More than your success I’m so happy for your daughter Shade. Much love to Erica. And when you find love, we’ll be there with our canopy at your wedding  gbedu. LOL

Day 28: Preye

2013 started on an all time low for me. There were so many ups and downs, twists and turns, but despite all God came through for me, and for this I have come to testify on 19th Street.

So late last year I was with the hubs partying and having plenty fun when my mom called with the news that my dad was ill. I asked to speak with him and she said he was too weak to even talk on the phone! That call threw me off balance, so many thoughts ran threw my mind. No I wasn’t ready to lose my dad.

The next day we were back in Port Harcourt. I watched my dad slipping away while we searched frantically for a donor with a  matching kidney. Those days were dark. Fast forward to January 14 when my elder sister called from yankee that she and her hubby of 10 years were going through a divorce. She said she would be fine but I should not tell our parents as she wanted to do it herself. My heart broke again as I wondered what the hell this year had in store for me.

Momsy volunteered a kidney for my dad. After all the confirmation tests here they left to India for the surgery, only to be told by the medical team that my mom’s kidney does not match dad’s. Travel money wasted, hopes dashed. We returned to Nigeria to continue the dialysis and resumed the search for a donor.

Meanwhile hubby had told me about taking a loan from the co-operative at work to assist his friend and best man that was going through financial challenges. I said yes please, because that guy had been there for us during the hubby’s 2 years of joblessness. He had even placed us on monthly up keep and was such a strong support. Weeks later in March hubby called me to tell me that the guy’s tugboat and products were hijacked by militants from the high seas. We were now in debt to the tune of some millions. The monthly pay back deductions meant there would be no luxury for a while just basics for survival. This was so hard seeing that we were both still trying to find our feet financially. At this point I had to drop the plan to go for my Masters. School fees were looking impossible. I have given up like “look 2013 whatever. Do your worst.”

On another angle my 3 year old then was having difficulties breathing. He would go to bed and wake up choking. The doctor said he had a very bad case of tonsillitis. He was not taking in enough air as a result of growths on his airway, so he would have to undergo a corrective surgery. Who would put a surgical knife to the throat of my 3 year old baby?! My heart could not take it; I cried and cried, did all the tests, made arrangements for the surgery and then entered my room. I cried, prayed to God to please heal my son. He healed loads of people in the bible, He should heal my son was all I asked of him. I cried till I dozed off.

I woke up feeling so light and refreshed felt like my burdens were all gone; I had this unusual calmness in face of all my challenges. I experienced first hand the peace of God the bible spoke of that surpasses all human understanding – having peace in spite of  daunting situations.

Finally my younger brother’s kidney matched my dad’s. On the second journey to India the surgery was successful! Whooop the joy! I was happy for the first time this year. Seeing my dad was well and strong again, I focused my prayers on my son’s surgery.

Then my childhood friend and dear sister Mrs. Pepple passed on. She had a two month miscarriage and died during the evacuation. I had gone to see her in the hospital while she was alive. There God had reminded me of how ungrateful I was.

He had saved me from a 6 month miscarriage earlier in my life. I bled from 8pm to 3pm profusely non stop; my hubby, mom, sister in-law all donated blood for me and the doctor said if by 6 pm the bleeding didn’t stop, they would take out my uterus abi womb out to stop the bleeding and save my life. I prayed and said God please let this  bleeding stop and it stopped. I was induced and the foetus came out.

When I remembered this, I knelt down in the clinic I told God I was sorry for my ingratitude and I thanked him profusely. I’m always about the things he hasnt done but forget to thank him for the ones he has done.

In June, we had to go for medical tests at UniPort teaching hospital in preparation for my son’s surgery. The Dr. said he wanted to see me. I was so scared. I got in to his office and he said he was confused. The results were all negative and there were no growths. I was shaking. I didn’t believe him so I took him back to Prime labs for tests. Again there were no growths. God healed my son. I had just experienced firsthand the miracles I read in the bible.

My joy knew no bounds. I was so happy! No more surgery! My faith rose. I learnt how to thank God for challenges, instead of whining and complaining. 

Weeks later my elder sister called to tell me that her husband came back home. He had found Jesus, and came back begging with his pastor.

I was blown away! I was like God, is this how you work?! I wasn’t even done thanking him for my elder sister’s marriage when the hubby called to say NDDC had paid his the outstanding 3 years debt they owed him. His friend just paid in half of the loan my hubby took from the cooperative. Jesus!!! This could not be happening!

My sister also called me to say her hubby got a job and that they were renewing their vows on his birthday, whoop!!! Another beautiful thing that happened was that my favourite cousin got married and sealed an international job, after 5 years of being unemployed.  That marriage was like Christmas for my entire family.

Suddenly I fell in love with 2013. Loads of answered prayers, things that seemingly looked impossible became possible. God came through for me, he spoke peace to my worried soul, he calmed all the raging storms of my life, wiped my tears and put a smile on my face.

2013 was designed by God to bring me closer to him, to teach me gratitude and how to trust him wholly and completely. Not all my prayers were answered but I now have peace knowing that God knows best.

I like planning and having my stuff in place and well figured out. God LOLed at me this year sha. I’m sure he yimu-ed at my plans several times. Yes because even after praying I would try to figure out how he was going to do it and ask Virgin Mary kinda questions “seeing I’m (insert life problem) how can these be?” forgetting that what God promised he would do! (Luke 1:45)

I learnt to let go and let God do his thing.

My 2013 review would not be complete without my weightloss. After trying out so many short cuts to lose weight I discovered Delatarre on  twitter. They made it look so easy and appealing, I consulted  with them and the journey to eating clean  and training dirty began. I registered for the shred challenge and went down from a size 20 to 14. I was shocked and proud of my achievements! My twitter family was such a strong support system. My twitter clique is cooler than yours *shines teeth*

“I love the peace you exude lately, I love the woman you are becoming , I love your calmess in the face of difficulties, I love this woman please never lose her.” These were the words of my boo, my king, my crown of life to me this year. Shege jagwa!!! Coming from a man who knows me better than anyone else meant so much because I CAN WORRY FOR AFRICA. I worry way too much. Now I have learnt to lay it at Jesus feet and leave them there. And my hubby loves it!

I’m so happy that everything life threw at me made me better. Come 2014 I’m committing an unknown future into the hands of an all knowing God. In 2014 I shall not need to fight I will just sit back and see the salvation of GOD because if he said it he will do it. my Heart shall be still.



*bows* Sister Preye’s testimony hasn’t even started. Trust me this was the short version! Sister! Testify!