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“For those who wait”
Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice, but for those who love, time is eternity
– Henry van Dyke
“For those who fear”
“We just have to wait and see, it might be cancer we can only know for sure when we cut her open”
Those words were said about someone very close to me. And the doctors were suspecting brain cancer. My life paused for a couple of minutes when I heard those words. And then the minutes ran. One test ran into another: biopsies, surgeries, chemotherapy, radiotherapy.
Months rolled into months. Fear became a constant emotion; constant state of mind. So much that living without it is an anomaly.
“For those who grieve”
My soul sister Modurodoluwa went to rest with the Lord this year. The days after were filled with darkness, despair, depression. Those were nearly the longest days of my life.
I grieved and still grieve for friendships, relationships, things I could have had, things that have happened, things that have not happened.
“For those who rejoice”
The times of rejoicing were few and very, very far between but I relish and cherish them. Times spent laughing over cocktails with the gang, crying tears of joy over somebody’s good news, drowning with relief when the tests came back negative. Rejoicing was found in rehearsals for dance club, practice for the school concert, excursions, practical classes, shopping with the girls, taking silly pictures, making memories.
“For those who wait”
2013 felt like a gap year in so many ways; a year that just existed. It just WAS. The recurring theme for the year was waiting. And I learned that sometimes, waiting can be part of the process. Sometimes it can be the very point of the whole thing. I learned not to wish the wait away, but to try to get all the lessons that can be got from the period instead.
“For those who love”
My family of choice has been amazing this year. I took the conscious decision to only expend effort on the things and people that add value to my life ( as cliché as it sounds) and it has paid off. So much. I made a couple of new friends, rekindled old friendships and they truly made the road worth travelling.
If anyone were to ask me what the biggest lessons I learned in 2013 was I would say it was to not spend too much time wishing the down times away because memories are made minute by minute. And to not necessarily wish the bad away.
So as I cross over to 2014, my prayers are that I have happier times and that I have the patience to make memories and take in the scenery every step of the way.
May your road be rough!
Cheers to an excellent 2014.
For the third year in a row Moyin has launched this series here on 19th Street. We all love her. Thank you Moyin