Semi-Rant: Dear Girls

Bolouere (@Boluxxxx) has a point to make about keeping to the terms of the contract.
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Code name; B.

B- Buxom, Bombshell, Brilliant, Boss, Buoyant, Brassy, etc. Did I just describe Beyonce? Naaa, that’s a B-word too. **chuckles**

I’ve been in constant reverie recently inspired by events, happenings, doings, occurrences played out by females around me and I have decided that we girls are responsible for our troubles, drama and heartbreak.

I have this friend who had been in the process of setting a certain P for months. He was gonna be in some state in the Niger-delta region for christmas where “Miss P” is resident and yes they planned a hook up. Twas gon be sex, fun and games agreed. As his guy (yea I’m dyke in attitude), he gave me the gist as things went on. They hooked up, did all the had planned to, and finally had sex on christmas eve. Anyway’s he pinged me on christmas morning and goes ” Bee, she wants ‘talk’.”. In my mind I’m like “ghen-ghen, my guy don enter wahala”. We went on chatting and about ten minutes later I’m like “is she still talking”? He replied “yes”. I’m thinking WTF!!! Imagine me having a heart-to-heart convo, the “talk” with a dude and he stays chatting on his phone, that’s all the answer I need. (Well, that’s me). All the same, the summary of Miss P’s talk was; define this relationship. My friend’s reply was, we have a good thing going (sex) let’s not mess it up by starting something else. LoooOoool.

Fastfoward two days, he sends me a voice note he got from her. She cried on it, declared her love for him and said she felt used. See something oh!! Whose fault is it you caught feelings during an event that stated “strictly setting P”. He’s like “Bee what do u think?” My verdict; she probably likes you, wants a relationship, is automatically suffering from low self esteem because she f**ked you (dumb) and crying on a voice note, that’s simply a symptom that’s she’s a mildly psychotic chick (topic for another post). My guy, RUN. He did run.

Back to being responsible for our troubles as girls, much to my awareness, most guys don’t lie about their “wants” these days. It also doesn’t hurt to ask a guy what his intentions are if he suddenly starts paying you plenty attention. If he says he wants to shag, he means it oh. It’s left for you as the chick to decide whether you can do just that or not. Going into sh*t like that thinking he might have a change of heart and wife you is very unlikely and major self deception especially if he was bold enough to state that all he wants is sex. Yes we are human, yes we can’t help but fall for people at times. But he was bold enough to say, just sex, and that’s all there might ever be to it whatever you do. If you catch feelings, I’d love to say OYO but I’m nice so I’ll say DEAL WITH IT. And by dealing with it I didn’t say go and bombard peeople’s TL’s with irritatingly philosophical tweets like “why do bad things happen to good people” or “treat girls the way you want your sisters to be treated”. Personally I hate seeing such on my TL. It can drive me to mentioning you to amadioha and his strike is more painful than ASUU’s trust me. Get a grip, go about it in a mature manner. If it gets too hard, talk to pals or axe ya mummy for tips. *kidding**

My point (despite not being a feminist or softie) is, I think we as girls have what it takes to run the world and handle situations. If only we would man-up (ironic**sighs**) shun pettiness and do just that.

Dear girls, we are beautiful and have more power than we realise. Stop throwing blame flames at guys and hosting pity parties when things come up. Let’s learn to tell the truth to ourselves about situations and act accordingly not ruling out facts and reality.

More importantly, run YOUR world! Safe!!!

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73 thoughts on “Semi-Rant: Dear Girls

  1. qama says:

    Gunshots goin off in my head!!!! True sometin!

  2. derry says:

    Rock on girl! Truth is bitter but we love the taste

  3. nakam bitch says:

    Miss Peo from Big brother? Errmm sisi eko I’m sorry but money runs the world. ” Dear girls we are beautiful” certainly you weren’t talking abt weird MC.

  4. terdoh says:

    Are you gonna bang doe?

  5. Hmnn…
    Interesting take and I agree with most of what you said. I don’t agree that you girls have what it takes to ‘run the world’. *side eye*
    Truth is just as there are many girls like the one described above on social networks, there are those who stick to the terms of agreement as well.
    It’s not wrong to catch feelings, what’s wrong is holding on to those feelings. (Especially after sex) What are you, 17? Niggas should just set mature ‘p’. Like she implied, it does work.

    Good job Bibi.

    • bolouere says:

      U don’t think girls have what it takes to run the world? Didn’t you read about Cleopatra that held the mumu button of Anthony? And in recent times, Dame Patience Jona who controls Uncle Goodie. Respect women Lanre.

  6. Tori says:

    I really like this post. It is very realistic, and many girls need to be reminded of this fact.
    When the guy is upfront from the very beginning bout what he wants, its hard to blame him later because one person caught feelings.
    I also feel bad for those girls that believe they can “change” him.
    He will NEVER change. Maybe for a few months he will, to make u happy, but he is who he is, until HE is ready to change.
    U got two options, deal with it, or walk out d door.
    I would pick d latter.
    Nice post.

  7. bee.. says:

    Lmao.. Funny story n true talk. Absolutely loved it .

  8. rabella says:

    *Sigh* sad truth,if only things were so simple!

  9. chillysauce says:

    Nice post. I think girls know when its “fucking” and when “its dating” but refuse to tell themselves d truth. Maybe bc of romance they ve created in their dreams or bc of d bullshit they tweet. Sometimes girls just wanna fuck. That one is cool. Fuck and move on. When you keep returning to same dick, that’s when those feelings inevitably follow. And u become clingy, needy.. Urgh! So unattractive.

  10. Annie says:

    Shebi 1st he has 2 actli SAY wat the deal is…?! Thank u.
    I thot it wz me jst bein petty. *rme*

  11. raihanah says:

    Exactly..
    Don’t be putting out and hearing wedding bells as you see stars…

    Enjoy the shag if you will and know you did it for the pleasure….no point saying you were used,he didn’t bribe you,did he?

  12. Akpama Kadiayena Reuben says:

    Am really impressed n touched by this write up,which is very true of what’s happening these days. Its really unfortunate for the ladies,when guys are willing to have sex,party,drink,smoke and have fun with just any available lady,but when its a WIFE a guy want’s,it aint just any available LADY. Another thing that marvel’s me,is how a guy can start up a convo with a lady,she would not ask if he’s dating any1 or what he want’s from her,knowing she doesn’t want 2 just have sex and end the relationship. I ask maself sometimes,if some ladies are still being charmed by men these days,cause it’s hard 2 believe that a right thinking lady,who want’s a serious relationship,will not take time out to talk on issues that matter in a serious relationship,before she give’s her body to a man. Like you said,we all should always be ready to face the consequences of our decisions and actions,especially when we feel or know we are old and matured enough to do certain things and for ourselves. This is one good write up,that I suggest,could be in a movie or play. To be honest,this is a real situation,which is also a good script 4 a movie. Rule your world and stay safe to.

  13. Frankices says:

    Seconded!

  14. Constance Chimezie says:

    True gospel!

  15. awizii says:

    WORD.

    Shit, if I’m fucking I say it straight out. In fact, I’ll set the tone RIGHT from the chat so you know what the fuck I’m talking about. No drama.

    I really like this.

  16. mac says:

    Funny write-up with lots of truth in it. Provided the terms of agreement was stated on from day 1, whoever catches feeling would have him or herself to blame but again that’s what happens when ur dealing with people who are not matured to stand by their decisions especially when its just fuck!

  17. BragginRightz says:

    I definitely agree with what Bee wrote in the blogpost, but then it’s easier for me…. I’m a guy.

  18. Fanta_101 says:

    She deserves an applaud. Couldn’t have said it better

  19. lepahtohbahd says:

    Yaaaay,Bibi *thumbs up*
    This post is totally realistic.Girls,d worst kind of deceit is self-deceit.Face the facts(as hurtful as that might be) απϑ move on.It might not be so easy but its better than grovelling for attention you’d never get.

  20. Olise' says:

    I’m kinda relieved that this straight talk came from a lady who’s a lady…Let’s face it, having sex outside marriage is like trying to use a phone without a SIM card to make a call. IT WON’T CONNECT. Let’s do the right thing and stop the drama. If you want to have fun and just play games and music on the phone…so be it. If you want to make Emergency Calls Only, knock yourself out. If want to connect, Simply Insert Marriage!

  21. papyrusczar says:

    I like this. See things for what they are, not what you want them to be. Stick to the plan and you won’t get hurt.
    Nice rant lol

  22. Mz_Shadee says:

    Loooooooooool *sigh*

    Ok let me say, I don’t think there is anything wrong in catching feelings, some people have been known to get married even when it started from P setting *dodges rotten eggs*

    Well I will always say, if u can’t handle d P do not set it. Nice post boo (y) :*

  23. Fanta_101 says:

    So I came back to correct my error……Bolu, you deserve an applause

  24. Snazz says:

    Nice one, and very true too… You should write more often o.

  25. Emy says:

    Nice, Well said!

  26. Anonymous says:

    Niceee. I like d post cos its very realistic. Gurls shud “wise up” o or else!!!

  27. @IllusionistXV says:

    In my experience, the problem is some of these chiques think they’ve got the “shag” to turn a career philanderer into a touchy-feely, cupid arrow-pierced puppet. When they figure out they were wrong, they can’t deal. Even worse, some of these chiques might have heard of your sickening track record, but they still want to try. It’s pathetic really.

  28. @IllusionistXV says:

    Great post!

  29. omoge_arhyur says:

    Hmmmmm…..nice! Did she think P setting ll lead to marriage b4?…..

  30. lordfiddler says:

    Everyday we beg girls to “use ya head, not ya heart” but I’m beginnin to find that that guideline shud also be directd @ d men-folk also cos dis “Needy after d P” syndrome is no respecter of sex! Guys r gettin caught-up in dis mosquito net as well.
    Weldone B…nice write-up. (u can throw ur back-flips now, LoL!)

  31. EZRA says:

    Yea,we tend 2 get it twistd most tyms(ladies).I know wat its lik 2 luv d wrongest dude bt guess its all on me.lool

  32. thatifygirl says:

    Me, I’m a boss because boys catch feelings for me. (._. )
    Theoretically sha.

  33. coolprincee says:

    will u marry me? Or set p wit me?
    Which ever is convenient for u. I like a gal that’s got some cojones 🙂

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