Day 10: Deolaa

Many of you may not know Deola (@Deolaaa). Until now…

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I have trust issues. I’m someone who by default, does not trust anybody…ok! Maybe babies not more than 6 months old and just one friend. You do not have to give me a reason and when on January 1 2011, on my way from church, I saw a classical Yoruba movie sacrifice on my way from church, I knew this year would be all sorts of Rick Ross unsexy.

Many things have happened this year and I should confess I didn’t ever think I would write about the worst year of my existence but maybe this would help…

In 2011 and for once in my life, I thought of killing myself and oh ye people, I made an amazing discovery- SUICIDE IS NOT EWA AGOYIN! The genius in me thought of another alternative – I could evaporate off this earth if I stopped eating. I went into depression (a fact I still deny) and weighed less than 45kg. Then, one day, after 30 days when hunger wanted to kill me, I ate! 😦 Apart from hunger, I thought of what my younger sisters would say when asked what killed their sister. Ebi lo pa egbon mi ku. (EDITOR Translation: It was hunger that killed my elder sister) No! That’s not sexy. Then, I thought of how my dad would just toss my emaciated body like a frisbee into the bush behind our family house in my village and order everybody to be throwing their left-over food at me. All these made me change my mind.

I’m gonna make a City People attempt at describing 2011…

1. SCHOOL: I’m currently writing this in a class where the lecturer is screaming ‘anus’, ‘tumors’ and ‘patients’. As you figured, I CAN’T BE BOTHERED.
I lost 18 months (almost 2 academic years) in school due to ‘ownership crisis’. This is as painful as shooting a woman straight through her vagina. No! The pain is more than that. I am a medical student that has eons to spend in school normally and 2 years now added to my eons? Sigh!
I shed a lot of tears. I had a huge fight with my parents. I blamed myself. I regretted the day I passed the cut-off mark for medicine. I blamed Hippocrates and all those pioneers of medicine. I cursed. I cried, cried, cried and cried!!!! Now I have to finish this course…I need strength. I’m spending 9/10 years in university altogether.

2. FAMILY: One thing 2011 taught me is celebrating other people’s success. I am proud to say I belong to the most beautiful and intelligent family. Everybody in my family made enough progress to swallow my ‘retrogress’ in school. They made me feel adopted! My elder brother graduated as the best Masters student in his faculty, my younger sister was admitted on merit to study her course of choice, my other younger sis was one of the best 20 out of thousands that wrote the entrance exam into one of the best secondary schools in Ibadan. My father was promoted and my mother’s request was granted by GOD. My bestie graduated in bright colors. Hallelu, hallelu…:D

3. DEATHS: I’m very grateful to God for not making me lose anybody I love this year. I was in a posting (in the hospital) where people dropped dead like chickens. A lot were the result of suicides committed, accidents and other causes. May they R.I.P. I was so overwhelmed that I even wrote a piece on my blog about it. Being a medical student makes you so over-protective of your loved ones…you just want them to report every thing wrong to the doctor. PLEASE, LET US ENCOURAGE OURSELVES & LOVED ONES TO DO THIS TOO. NOTHING IS INSIGNIFICANT UNLESS THE DOCTOR SAYS SO.

4. ENTERTAINMENT INDUSTRY: I’m going to start with twitter. The most entertaining event *eats one leaf off my ugwu stalk* was the Ugwu story. *puts ketchup on ugwu and continues eating*. I was highly involved in this ‘twevent’. I read all readable TL’s, searched vital key words and did what a trained and certified tatafo does.
This is closely followed by Mo’Cheddah’s story. Oops! Its sunny here *opens nose-shaped umbrella* Β Ehn ehn, like I was saying, it’s that story that involved one JA, one boyfriend, one nose, one girl and one baby….if you missed this story, I’m sorry, you might need to stop reading this.

I listened to a lot of music and watched a very few non-Yoruba movies seeing as I still need my brain for school. 😐

5. RAPE: I was very angry about the rape issue that was featured on Linda Ikeji’s blog. I was angrier at the stupidity exhibited by some “freaky” things that are supposed to be human. May God protect us from and reduce our stupidity in the coming year.

6. ROMANCE: I have plenty gist here but my host said I shouldn’t talk about romance. Sorry y’all, permission to stone him. (EDITOR: Dodges rotten tomatoes)

I must add that 2011 is my year of financial buoyancy. One moment I’m broke and the next minute, someone from somewhere gives me money. Grateful for this. Being broke with my messed up state of mind would have been lethal.

I also made two very good friends. They’re Β worth mentioning here. T&M :* (EDITOR: But you didn’t mention them in the end!)

RECOMMENDATIONS

People, in the coming year, let’s take note of the following:

-It is FATEFUL, not faithful.

-Do not practice whatever drawing skill you have on your face using your eyebrow.

-Hide your father from your friends.

-Rape can NEVER EVER be justified and yes! You can rape your wife/ husband.

Finally, if you can’t take it, don’t give it. (Let’s think of this in non-sexual ways).

Aurevoir.

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Thank you for sharing, Deolaa. Look forward to Nugwa tomorrow, people. See you. πŸ™‚

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23 thoughts on “Day 10: Deolaa

  1. This is my best. πŸ™‚

  2. ibetapassmynebo says:

    Looool
    My best so far
    Sorry bout skul
    It is well. . . πŸ™‚

  3. Mohnah says:

    Hehehehe! Nice one Deola, I pray you finish with school and don’t keep the depression to urself if it comes around again.

  4. raihanah says:

    I know this girl πŸ˜€

    Lovely piece Dee.. :*

  5. highlandblue says:

    Deola your family made you feel adopted?! Lol sighs. How do you fit in when everyone around you is moving in the opposite direction of success?! Thank God for giving you the strength to pull through that. And I think your ability to laugh at your issues is a divine gift. (((hugs)))

  6. joeyparker says:

    Candid. Glad I stopped by today.

  7. MsDuro says:

    “PLEASE, LET US ENCOURAGE OURSELVES & LOVED ONES TO DO THIS TOO. NOTHING IS INSIGNIFICANT UNLESS THE DOCTOR SAYS SO”

    I learnt this the hard way and I now drum it into peoples ears. No matter how embarrassing you think it is tell a doctor.
    It felt like you wrote most of this on my behalf, I like your post.

  8. malota says:

    I love this!! Very frank post!

  9. PreyingMantis says:

    Day 10, my best so far.

  10. Chicasa says:

    I’m glad I came back to read this πŸ™‚

  11. awizii says:

    In time….

  12. ” Everybody in my family made enough progress to swallow my β€˜retrogress’ in school. They made me feel adopted!” <————— U kno this, just as iDo. People don't seem to get it until iLet them see a little of my family then the head shakin and pityin looks start. *sigh* iSha still love my family.
    iThoroughly enjoyed ur post and, iHav read so many nice posts here lAm askin myself "hu send me message o?"

  13. @Sisi_Yemmie says:

    lmao!!! This post had me rolling on the floor!

  14. Kemmiiii says:

    This is my best so far…
    Frank with subtle hints of humor. Good one.

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